No Cum Dodging Allowed #13



Well gang, looks like we’re gonna see if #13 is good or bad luck for ol’Swiney as his hand at an edition/volume of NCDA is hitting the streets soon, and given the history of this series, his/my plate’s as full as it could get. Now, I’ve helped Mike make plenty of these movies/volumes over the years going back to 03′, but times were different for all of those experiences, both in regards to money & talent available to get these JUGGERNAUT gonzo attempts done. NCDA is one of, if not THE most dominant all sex/hard gonzo series of the modern/handheld era, and I’m not saying that because Mike is my best friend and I need to stroke anyone here. In fact, during my time at RLD & PXP I was insanely jealous at what Mike was able to do w/his lines because I didnt have ANY chance at getting approval on a movie that would have even 1/2 of what he threw around for NCDA. So I had to sit there and watch his domination over me and EVERYONE else in the biz every time I got to P.A. or shoot w/him which was like someone playing on a team w/Wayne Gretzky or in a band w/Eddie Van Halen; you cant hate the honest/natural talent that came out once everyone got to/on set. You had to be witness to what you couldnt do, even though you wanted to, and you knew what Mike was doing was going OFF! It was always so big,..

If anyone out there wants to try and compare ANY long running gonzo series to NCDA, say w/7-10 volumes or more, please do,..because that will only result in you getting completely embarrassed. NCDA by it’s own standards has some of the top tier girls from the most competitve/elite era of porno doing things un-imaginable, that NOBODY else was able to get like Mike did. Now, some gals pushed it hard for other shooters/companies, I know that and am not saying NCDA was their only stop on that big of a stage. Just that the series continual delivery of scene after scene of head scratching performances is absolutely unmatched by any directors one line, or series… Stay w/me, since this isnt about bias, but observation and eventual dread of someones shoes that are all too big to fill…

So the time came to decide what I was going to do next for Mike’s catalog w/him having stopped back in town last minute un-announced from Centro-America… NCDA nowadays has to have POV segments in it to make it financially feesible, so it was perfect he was here to kick it off w/Sarah Shevon before we blowbanged her. Well, plans changed and he was ‘indisposed’ for the segment w/Sarah so I jumped in hoping he would be around for the next POV slot. Nope,…Mikey had to bail early so NCDA was in my lap the rest of the way like it or not. Moving forward I was pretty confident things would be ok, but doing an NCDA front-back w/out Mike spooked me a little bit on principle alone. Sure I can shoot anything, I’ve proven that over the years to myself and to anyone who tried to throw IMPOSSIBLE movies/gigs my way like Kegger and Crowd Pleasers which were absolute tests in XXX for me as a shooter/director. But it was the intangibles I was worried about w/this volume of NCDA as here Mike wasn’t to be shooting any of it, and I dont have an extra 30k to throw around for 3-5 on ones w/DP’s, airtight and multiple swallows. Sure, I know those days are long gone and that the fans mostly know that, but the table scraps I had to spend for a line like this w/it’s histroy  was extremely daunting…but then came the cast.

After Sarah I knew Veruca James HAD to be in this flick, and Cameron Canada. Those chicks had been delivering for me lately  and NCDA was a great place for them to shine…and who else to make this 4-girl movie thick w/star power?,.. AJ Applegate! I had her on the hook, confirmed for a DP & four guy bj on back-back days and was sooo stoked because she too had recently been KILLING it in her scenes for us. But after 4-5 days went by she pulled out, wanting more money, leaving me high & dry for my final scene. Now,  I’m never going to blast AJ over anything, I’ve done two pov’s w/her where the sex was amazing and cant say how much I really like her as a performer, but her being new to the biz kept her from seeing what kind of damage was done to me and my schedule over basically and additional $200/$300  dollars. Not that AJ isn’t a premium performer, but I had strict caps on what I could pay each gal, and to be fair to Sarah, Veruca, & Cameron, there was no way I was going to budge for her. As if the pressure wasnt bad enough then we get hit w/the moratoriums, which left me in doubt that we would finish shooting the scenes in time to make our slot for september,… yep, the ‘biz-ness’ side is alive and well baby! And that’s rarely a good thing.

But we sometimes find our miracles through tragedies dont we? This is where booking Alana Rains off of pics only turned out to be my XXX lottery ticket for 2013, as this long legged, ‘tall drink of water’ 18 yr old walked in and SAVED this flick. And this is no slight to the GREAT performances that Sarah/Veruca/Cameron put in, but in a first timer DP scenario, Alana Rains stepped in and let the guys takeover until she was ready to bang back,….it’s something as a pornographer that you dont see often, but when a gal breaks a first ‘threshold’ like that so strongly for you, on your camera, you’re almost as excited about it as the 2 lucky stiffs in the scene getting their shit WAXED! The following day our pov segment was so easy I dont even feel like I paid that gal,…

And that’s where XXX/porno is a different world, job, life, commitment that even some of those in it for year after year dont get that kind gravity because they’re just button pushers or yes-men, not blue-blood scumbags like I am. I’m here for the juice, and NCDA for me had some of the most pungent, saturated sex in one movie front-back I’ve shot in a very long time. Now, I doubt NCDA#13 will stand up to ANY other volume for purists of this series on the merits of load count or group action, but I dont have the $$$ for that anymore anyways, so please dont kick the dog too hard when he doesnt really have any bones to bring home & bury like the other one did before him.

Yes, I am very happy w/what my ladies gave me for this movie, they were SOO good…. The chicks are the focal point, the sex right behind that, and all anal and all swallowing round out a very fun 4-girl dirty movie. I really hope you people out there can have at least 1/2 as much fun as I did w/this one. God Bless America, ~ Timothy Otto Wilhelm Gunther Dietrich von Swine IVth.

p.s.; ok, so I had sex w/3 of the 4 gals in this movie, but I DIDN’T have sex w/Veruca….looking thru and posting this gallery,…I’m getting a little upset about that…. Veruca James is a gal that can bang the soul out of a man if he’s not worthy, let it be known! I’m looking for round #3 as soon as possible! -Herr Swiney





9 Responses to “No Cum Dodging Allowed #13”

  1. Rick says:

    Hey TVS , Anything chance of shooting Cameron Canada’s DP or gangbang scene do? I’m fucking love this gal !!! she is amazing

  2. Fortknox says:

    Good work Mr Swine and nice chat/
    I was really diggin the trailer on this one as it seems the scenes worked
    What else is there to say except “nothing” beats good ol perverted valley porno

  3. T. Von Swine says:

    ^^Rick; the only way I see getting Cameron in a group/DP scene is if I can get her into Crowd Control #3..not sure if/when I’ll be doing that movie but that’s prolly the only chance and it’s pretty slim right now. thanx for the comments/questions guys, ttys -Swiney.

  4. mrbluelouboyle says:

    Hey Tim, I just read what you had to say about N.C.D.A., the series, and I agree completely. The bar was set high from the beginning. I have all of them and it’s the best gonzo series around today.

    I have complete faith in you to carry on the greatness!

    Word travels fast out here on the East coast and all The South Florida Scumbags are eagerly awaiting N.C.D.A. (Lucky Number) 13!

  5. T. Von Swine says:

    ^Lou; God Bless The South Florida Scumbags!…(& ALL other scumbags too).

  6. Harmless Demographic says:

    Dear Mike John,

    My jokes:

    1) I get on an elevator, a girl looks at me & smiles, I say,
    “can I smell your pussy?”
    she says, “no you can not!!!”
    I hesitate & say, “ah! must be your feet!!

    2) ?) why don’t Ken & Barbie make babies?
    A )Ken comes in a different box

    Please let me suggest:
    I’m in video love with Americans Jessica Robbin, Serena Ali, Cameron Dee, Krista James, Layla Terrance, Pepper Foxxx. We also need more natural blonde boob goddess’ added to the roster.

    these angles:
    1) girl laying on her back, head at the foot of the bed, looking up & taking a dick all the way down her throat! Go POV!!

    2) more side boob, more side boob hanging, underside boob hanging
    Breast Inspector…pull over!!!

    3) more behind the scenes: shower, dress em up, dress em down, BJ

    4) I’m sure those boob goddess’ JAV hotties would love to come to LA if they thought they’d get passed around & make it a working/paid holiday?
    you’re the real king of porn, make it so!

    5) I liked the concept Totally Unprofessional, it didn’t have my video girlfriends. I’d like to see you shoot in a costume shop.

    Good luck & great porn, Sid

  7. Harmless Demographic says:

    one more joke:

    I get out of the shower, I’m standing in front of the mirror shaving,
    I drop the razor & cut my dick, my dick looks up at me & says,

    “we’ve been in a lot of fist fights but I never thought you’d take a
    razor to me”

  8. Harmless Demograph says:

    Dear Mike John,

    Happy Anniversary for POV Pervert 15. Still the best porn ever. What you did with Adrianna Luna is perfect porn. While she’s always great, you’re the only one who made her great! Same is true with Chloe. They’ve both made several movies, yours is the only one I can watch over & over. If you can, please make POV Pervert 16.
    Thank you, Sid

  9. T. Von Swine says:

    POV #16 is almost done, has Laela Pryce, Chase Ryder, Zoey Monroe, Gabby Paltrova, Kitty Bella and 1 more gal tbd. I do all of the scenes since Mike is still out of the country handling his other business venture. -Swiney.